Lightning

This reminds me of the Hakiu form, however; it is not a Hakiu due to your length and syllable counts, I tend to think this might be some type of formed style of writting due to the length and general comparision of the Hakiu form.

Overall this was a nice short write which was well written, but not greatly written. I felt that it could have been a bit longer (of course if it isn't a formed poem) Overall it was too simplistic to my liking, many poems will do well with simplistic but for some reason this one doesn't catch my attention too much. 4/5 for me.

Peace, Joe

I liked the way you have this so simple. How you parallel lightning to camras going off is not somehting I would normaly think of when I look at lightning but I like this. Because what I think of when I read this poem is how you imply the rule that writers arnt people who have something to say so much as people who find diffrent ways to say things.

My favorite line of this would have to be:
Forking, bending across the sky

The way you have described the lighting bending across the sky is just a wonderfull image. The lightning becomes clear and focused in my mind as I read this line
I look forward to reading your other work

I actually really like the idea behind this poem. (: I love unique nature pieces, and this has great potential. Your descriptions were nice, about the camera flashes, and lighting up that which could not have been seen before ... I like those. However, I feel you could branch out your vocabulary a bit ... "flash" was used a few times in the first stanza, and sky was repeated in both ... I just think it would be much stronger if you made it a bit more cryptic grammar wise.

Just my opinion though. With a little
tweaking this will absolutely awesome!

Keep writing down the bones,
`Nova

Interesting description of lightning. It was a good poem because it was easy on the eyes and had some good descriptive words.
However, it was a little basic and simple, and could probably do with a couple more stanzas, just to finish the poem off and give it some meaning.
Sole x