Untitled Love poem

Great free verse flowing straight from the heart

Really good poem. I disliked the second stanza, and the last could be better. Which I showed you how I thought it would improve. Overall you have a decent poem. I'm sure your boyfriend will/did love it.

The pain that I have
been through in the past
cute deep and true
so I had put up protection
so there would be no more.

[The pain that I've
been through in the past,
cut deep and true.
So, I put up protection
to block what may come.]

** I disliked the very last line. Actually this stanza I wasn't too fond of. You had a great start then this one kind of threw me off. I think it's because the flow is way off. Above I have a way you could fix it. It's still not completely flow flawless but it's a bit better and still gets the same point across with pretty much the same words, just in minimal wording.

and swept me into heaven.
[and swept me off my feet]

** I get that 'swept me off my feet' is used a LOT in poetry but 'into heaven' was just odd to me. It's probably just me, though.

this or die of heart ache.
[ or die of heart ache.]

** much better with out 'this'..

I want to be with you
more than anything.
So please take me
into your arms and
ask me to be yours forever.

[ I want to be with you,
more than anything.
So take me in your arms
and ask me yours forever.]

** I thought it would be better as 4 lines since the first is only 4 lines. And, it flows better as well that way.

This is amazing 5/5