If You Only Knew

This distance is tearing me apart.
I wish I knew the path to your heart.
I'm so sick of feeling alone and sad.
I hope everyday I won't be so bad.
But all I remember when I wake,
Is when you said this distance was fake.
It was necessary, like taking it slow.
Maybe it is, but it is hurting me so.
You said it's harder for you than me,
Oh if you could only see.
I look like I'm dying, there's no life left.
I try to deny it, but you've made the theft.
My heart is yours, my life, my soul.
I wish I knew if you're gonna fill this hole.
You said don't be pessimistic, just hold on.
But I can't help but think you're forever gone.
Oh can't you see how this is killing me inside.
It's like no other pain before, and I have to hide.
I can't breakdown, I always have to lie.
That there's no meaning behind every sigh.
Everyday I have to pretend.
That my thoughts aren't hard to fend.
And as I sit here taking it, each and everyday,
I await your answer and what you will say.
If you only knew that I cry myself to sleep everynight.
Thinking of you, hoping you won't take flight.
I sleep worse, thoughts haunting my lonely mind.
I don't eat right, no food is worth it to find.
I'm always cold, it could be the sunniest of days.
My heart stops, twists, races, like it's in a maze.
I want to tell you everything that this is doing,
But that'd be playing you're feelings, worth sueing.
I want you to be sure of yourself when you tell me
That you really love me, you were too dumb to see.