Questions of the mind

How am i supposed to just forget you?
you mean so much more to me then i let on
i know what i have to do
and i will do it with a smile
cause I'm tired of being selfish
I'm tired of not being happy
all i ever asked for was you
i didn't want anyone else
i cant just sit here
and watch you leave
but i cant stop you
and i wont
i shouldn't cry
i should be over his
why is this still bugging me?
why are you still in my head?
drowning me
making me suffer
do i not deserve you?
what is it?
you know the funny thing
is I'm never going to find out
I'm never going to let all this go
you were once the reason i lived
and i cant just let you go
but i will
bot because i want to
because i have to