Grain by Grain

by Inside the Liar   Jul 9, 2009


Building a sand castle
is a lot like building
a relationship.
You take a bunch
of smaller towers
and mesh them together
until they create something else entirely.
Something majestic and beautiful,
if done right.

But if you aren't careful;
if you don't properly judge the distance
between your castle and the waves,
everything you've worked for
could be washed away.
It would only take a second.

The way the tide comes in
and sweeps away all your
hard work is so disappointing.
Just when you build it up tall enough;
big enough, strong enough,
something as simple as water
seeps in and brings it down.
That's when you know
it was never enough.

My parents never took me to the beach.
I've never seen the tide come in,
and I can't really say
that I'm sick of building castles
in the sand
because I've never tried.

I don't know how to build
a sand castle.
Or a relationship.

Will you teach me?

Copyright 2009 S. Sieglaff

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Latest Comments

  • 16 years ago

    by ChallengexEverything

    Wow.
    loved the metephor of sand castels and relationships :]
    it made perfect sense.

    well done:]
    5/5

  • 16 years ago

    by Corruption

    This is a great poem
    i love how you refer to a
    building a relationship like building a sandcastle
    i have never thought of it like that
    but after your poem it
    made me realize they really are similar

    great job
    an obvious 5/5 :D

    Keenan

  • 16 years ago

    by kevin Boundy AKA the ghost

    Definitely an excellent poem. loved the style loved the emotion and i loved the metaphor 5/5 keep it up.

    p.s p.m me sometime if you have the time :)

  • 16 years ago

    by Crys908

    Wow this is great. i love the metaphor of how a relationship is like a sand castle. and about learning to build relationship takes a lot of test and trial. you've just got to learn by making mistakes. :) good luck!
    -wei

  • 16 years ago

    by Courageous Dreamer

    'You take a bunch
    of smaller towers
    and mesh them together
    until they create something else entirely.'
    `I dont think that entirely is needed- its unnecessary and only makes the line longer.. which will throw off your flow in a snap.

    I have always adored your poetry because its out of the norm, its not what you normally see on here. You can truly hear your voice in all your pieces, because you write from your perspective.. that makes your pieces very strong to begin with. Not only that but you write it in a unique way, its kind of like a speech but then again its not. Keep it up, I liked how you used the lyrics you were given..it was a neat idea. Great job.

    5/5.

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