Dead Inspiration

Looking for inspiration,
my dormant mind declined
while on the brim of insanity;
I've got to rid this feeling of desolation
I have to break these mental chains.
*I can just picture you looking for inspiration and there's none to find and that you're just about to reach sanity and just before you reach it you break free of these chains holding onto you, very powerful opening.*
I walked through nature
Nothing is what I seemed to find,
That is the moment I discovered,
I was spiritually blind.
*WOW, another powerful stanza. I can imagine you walking through the fields and thinking the grass isn't grass, etc. You're words are so unique.*
I searched my thoughts
All like looking into a perpetual hole
The memories of my life,
Even the darkest void of my soul.
*Emotional, powerful and flawless stanza.*
I gathered my anger,
A last hope of inspiration,
To release it upon the page.
One final attempt at my art.
At once fury came to me;
I tore the page apart.
*I love the imagery of you getting so annoyed at writing down your thoughts that you just ripped the page apart because the sheer thinking angered you so much. Powerful.*
I sat down and tried to collect my thoughts
Still craving for something to be created,
Then I observed nothing from my imagination
Was written down and translated.
*Inspiration sometimes come and sometimes it doens't. Enjoyable read. Very powerful and well written. Good job, 5/5. Em*

It's clear you had plenty of inspiration to help create such an excellent poem. The rhyming was awesome and the images in it flowed like magic.

Well, there are no simple words for this poem. It was amazing from start to finish. It caught hold of me at the second stanza because most poems that are not "rhyming" usually loose sight of the main point of the poem. They are usually just words put together. Your focus was shown throughout the piece. I like how real you were about everything, yet you made it your own version of the reality for instance
"I gathered my anger,
A last hope of inspiration,
To release it upon the page.
One final attempt at my art,
At once fury came to me,
I tore the page apart."
I think many of us have felt this and can relate, but the way you put it in words you make it your own. I haven't read anything good in a very long time. Thank you for writing this. :) deffinately 5/5 Continue to write because you are great at it.

-Hell

I really like this poem. I think this is pretty powerful. It is full of alot of emotion and you can certainly feel the frustration. I think that you worded this poem very well and it gives it a somewhat sophisticated feel. I think you did a great job.

Looking for inspiration,
my dormant mind declined
while on the brim of insanity;
I've got to rid this feeling of desolation
I have to break these mental chains.

After reading the first stanza I thought this poem was going to be a NON rhyming poem.
At this point I thought the first stanza was just ok.

I walked through nature
Nothing is what I seemed to find,
That is the moment I discovered,
I was spiritually blind.

This stanza rhymed so I was completely thrown off. I like this stanza alot by the way probably my favorite one.

I searched my thoughts
All like looking into a perpetual hole
The memories of my life,
Even the darkest void of my soul.

Great stanza, it continues the point of your poem and it rhymed well.

I gathered my anger,
A last hope of inspiration,
To release it upon the page.
One final attempt at my art.
At once fury came to me;
I tore the page apart.

I didn't like this stanza because it changed up the flow of the poem so much. I noticed a rhyme in there but it just felt wrong. My suggestion would be to completely remove line two and three so it looks like this.

I gathered my anger,
One final attempt at my art.
At once fury came to me;
I tore the page apart.

much better, cool point, and better flow.

I sat down and tried to collect my thoughts
Still craving for something to be created,
Then I observed nothing from my imagination
Was written down and translated.

I love this stanza, great ending and great poem.