Grief

I want to say goodbye
But I can't-
My throat seals up-
Like I'm suffocating
Constantly catching my breathe-
Grasping my heartbeat,
Trying to recapture you,
But you keep fluttering
Away.
I feel as if I'm
Dying as well-
I Just want
to be near you
That would be enough for me.
I am reminded that it's simply
Just a dream-
Playing with my emotions.
I know the Grim Reaper has visited you,
But I can't let go-
I don't know how to move on;
I drink to null the pain
I smoke to dull the memory
I laugh when I want to cry
I am quiet, so its easy to hide...
I only cry in front of
Jack Daniels- a close friend.
And I scream with
Bacardi- a nice Companion.
... I don't know how to move on...