Will it ever change

I sit here staring out the window
Watching the people pass me by
Will i ever be normal again
Or is the forever goodbye?

I dont understand
How could it all turn bad so fast
I thought everything had changed
That i left that person in the past

I guess you can never run away
From all the mistakes you have made
So as a last resort
Once again i turn to the blade

Why must it always come to this
Why cant i just be normal again?
What did i do to deserve all this
All this heartache and pain.

I dont know if the pain will ever stop
Or if my heart will ever heal
So ill just sit here in silence
Until i once again learn how to feel..