Yesterday

I agree with the above! I like what u r saying here but it doesnt hav that flow! But still its a gud one:) Keep writing!

Um, I'll be honest, I think the changing rhyming scheme hindered this poem an awful lot. Because of the rhyming scheme, it didn't seem to flow, to me. It seemed jumpy. I must say though, I did enjoy the direction of your piece, and most of all, I enjoyed the last couplet. It was a strong ending, and that's important.

Brad

P.S. Please vote and comment honestly on all the poems that you read.

I like this poem; though at times some lines felt kind of cut up..

It rhymed well in the first stanza but majority of the rest of the poem didn't.
Though I personally don't look at poems for rhythm I look at them for emotion and the vision they create in my mind, I prefer to favor poems that don't rhyme on every line or try to for that matter, it just feels compact and in some way generic.. And leaves less room for expression in a sense.

Your poem got it's point across and I didn't mind it but it really didn't light my cigar so to speak .

I'm sure with a little fine tuning this could be much better :)

Keep it up though
And to be honest don't take my comment the wrong way if it turned out how you wanted it too than it's perfect because poetry is expression sometimes people like your stuff.. Sometimes they don't.

If you have any more you like me to read vote and comment on some of mine andet me know :)

Indeed what a word.

Very well written poem that reflects well the issues with escaping the past