Comments : A Sailor's Spirit

  • 13 years ago

    by Ingrid

    And down the oceans deep dim expanse
    like a bold mountain in proud enhance
    my ship will stand,& sail with continuance ..
    Will make from the lightning sweet romance
    and the angry waves shall be my ships dance

    ^^
    This was my favorite stanza, Nana:)

    What an uplifing and wise verse you made..I have no doubt you are the master of your ship and a good captain at that:)

    * hugs *

    5/5 Ingrid

    ps: Good luck at the contest!!!!!!

  • 13 years ago

    by Lady Nik

    This was a beatiful poem :] and I'm very glad you joined our club. I can tell you have a great amount of talent and I can tell you will do well in PR. Nice poem dear :] keep it up :] Nik

  • 13 years ago

    by chind

    That was really good! a very beautiful piece. I like how it kind of started off a little unsure, with the heavy rain, the fear of the water; it all sounds a little dangerous, but then you completely changed it around! it caught me off guard and by the end of it i was thinking WOW! that was amazing!

    "And the ocean shall be afraid on his tide
    as the sky & its power comes to my side
    bowing to my faith, singing for my grip
    storms shall be afraid, but learn from
    my sailing ship..."
    - that last stanza really just completed the whole poem, it was very well written, and my favourite part of it!

    good work :) definitely a well deserved 5/5

  • 13 years ago

    by Michael D Nalley

    This one would make Dylan envy you

  • 13 years ago

    by Michael D Nalley

    Visions Of Johanna
    Ain’t it just like the night to play tricks when you’re tryin' to be so quiet?
    We sit here stranded, though we’re all doin’ our best to deny it
    And Louise holds a handful of rain, temptin’ you to defy it
    Lights flicker from the opposite loft
    In this room the heat pipes just cough
    The country music station plays soft
    But there’s nothing, really nothing to turn off
    Just Louise and her lover so entwined
    And these visions of Johanna that conquer my mind
    And down the oceans deep dim expanse
    like a bold mountain in proud enhance
    my ship will stand,& sail with continuance ..
    Will make from the lightning sweet romance
    and the angry waves shall be my ships dance

  • 13 years ago

    by Sunshine

    As if my poem is stolen ?

  • 13 years ago

    by Sunshine

    Or half of it shall i say

  • 13 years ago

    by Spirit

    I love the begaining. The repitition and the word choice are amazing. I love the how you inserted the quotation into your poem. If you were trying to keep up the same AAAA rhyme scheme it didn't really work.
    The story imbedded into your poem was beautiful.
    I'm really glad that you decided to enter my contest, and I wish you the best of luck.
    Thanks for the read.
    >~Spirit~>

  • 13 years ago

    by Meena Krish

    An uplifitng read this was..it's filled with hope as well as courage..liked it :)