Need a Break

Feel like picking up the phone,
sending a text,
then i rethink it,
and just stare at my walls,

why am i even here anymore?
don't feel like i fit,
don't feel like you care at all,
just need a break,

need to rethink my situation,
make some different choices,
take a new approach,

throw myself into religion?
naw it let me down,
cant confide in family,
they all die or i do,
so what do i do?

sink deeper and deeper?
let it all fill my brain,
giant puddles of toxic pain swirl around in my chest,
cant seem to breathe,
always drowning,

i need to get out of here,
i need a break.