A Real Good Man

What is this? Surely you jest!
A gigantic oxymoron contest?
Given that fact, I'll try not to detract
Thereby giving my all and my best

Tall, dark and handsome, in tailor-made suits
Or Levis, leather and cowboy boots
You'll choose you own flavor soon enough
But I prefer mine rich, naked and buff

He'll complain as a maiden you were much more svelte
While thirty pounds of jello jiggle over his belt
Over his beer at the table he'll linger
But under the sheets you'll hear "Hun, pull my finger"

He'll get drunk and dis you to all of his friends
Then bring home limp roses to make his amends
He'll not understand why you're still upset
That wasn't all that was limp, I'll bet!

You've noticed I'm sure, I've left out the "good"
An infraction of rules to the letter
But I've found through the years and all of my tears
On some nights "bad" is just better

copyright Anna Stephens