Sighs.... lilies are beautiful...etherees are beautiful when written with elegance and the right flow... its hard to make the words fit from time to time... but you nailed it... Jenni- this nature poem sings to me... makes me smile...

This is beautifully written Jenni...using Lilies makes the whole poem take on a new meaning... I love the whole aspect of this, as Etheree's are so hard to pen perfectly...the flow is crucial as are the words and you did a great job.

Lovely piece of poetry, made me smile too

xx

I love this form, im definitely going to have to push out of my comfort zone and try it :). this is so pure and breathtaking...the last line really stuck out to me, i love it...also great word usage throughtout the poem

Well I'm not used to you doing formed poetry nice to see you out your comfort zone

A really beautiful write Jen jen

Very impressive poem my friend. Such talent shown in a very hard form to pull off so well done.

This was a lovely write Jenni..no doubt about it but two things I stumbled over so I thought I'd let you know...

embracing snoopings in your arms

The first two words end in ing and snoopings just dind't read right to me ...would you consider changing it to secrets?

and this...

This is the start of something beautiful.

This is just a statement...by swapping the first two word around you end up asking a question which I personally think would finish the poem off better..

Is this the start of something beautiful?

Just some thoughts for you to consider...

Beauty in every word. It makes the world seem brighter somehow. Good job Jenni as always
TJ

Although I was saddened that your Fumbling Maybes hasn't won, I must say that this masterpiece that my silly self didn't have the chance to read is so well-deserved.

Congratulations, yummy pie.

Lillies are such a pure flower, I especially love the white lillies.....I think this is the first time I've read something like this from you Jenni, or at least a nature poem. It was incredibly graceful.

I'd never heard of susurrating before, but I do now. I love how you include it with secrets and "poetry among smiles". I also like how you said "visage" instead of just face or appearance. The question at the end is so inspiring...

Beautiful form, beautiful words from an amazing poet that brings these words to have their own breathtaking meaning....Congrats on the win!!!

This is such an elegant nature piece but it also feels like a love piece as well... what a creative Etheree!
From start to finish I was captivated by its flow and stylish flare. Each line made me feel the love of the lilies and within I could also feel the author smiling... or just reminiscing.. either way... it's a delightful formed piece! Well Done Jenni

I love poems that end in questions! It gets me wondering long after I finish reading the poem and I try to come up with answers. I loved your word choice here...I don't think I have ever seen "susurrating" before but I loved it. It fit right in with the piece and thrilled with the alliteration : )

"while my mind wants to keep wandering.
Is this the start of something beautiful?"
^I liked your use of "wandering" here. I liked that "wondering" could fit into that slot as well but you scored twice with just one word. The mind wanders and wonders about the final question...nicely done!

Deserved win Jenni, great imagery in this wonderful poem.

well done

Very well written and original !!

Jenni,

I love this poetry form so I absolutely couldn't resist leaving you a comment. Lillies are a flower that I just happen to adore, they're beautiful so I was also curious to see how you depicted them in your writing. They're symbolic of purity so I was wondering if this was linked to anything personal for you.

I was actually really captured by this piece, the opening was powerful and the winds chiming your petals was stunning. I love natural poems but I really love short nature poems that pack so much imagery into them and you did that.

Nice work with the alliteration is 'susurrating secrets', you almost miss it because of the line breaks.

Wonderful short poem! Congrats on winning!
Mel

This is a beautiful poem, very well written I agree with Maple Tree it sounds both like a poem about nature and a poem about love. Your poem surrounded me as I read it. I look forward to reading more of your work.

Wow, I love etherees and this one is really beautiful. Love to see Lillies come to life in your amazing imagery.

Great job!

I love how this poem sparkles with springtime and leaves such a lovely fragrance of life!

Wow your words truly flow through me and flow off the page so very well. In this poem the vocabulary works so very well in the spots you used it. For example the word susurrating. It fit well where it is placed I feel because petal have that quiet aura about them. And if you think about it colours are quiet but they bring so much to life.

I love how you describe this flower at its beginning stages as you said at the end it is the start of something more to come. I believe flowers at any pointare truly bbeautiful and probably jave many stories to tell. The word dazzles is great where it is used or in the poem as a whole because as I said flowers truly shine.

This is a very beautiful poem indeed as it shows so much beauty in such a simple thing as a flower. You don't really see simple things as beautiful in this society. I love the title too because you portray what I assume is your favourite flower in the Lilly. Overall its so beautiful! 5