I'd finally had enough
I could no longer handle
All of this stuff
I filled a glass up with water
Grabbed a huge bottle of pills
I slid to the floor and swallowed
Over two hundred pills
One after another
Until I started to feel ill
I crawled into bed
Preparing for the end
I woke up three days later
I was in the hospital
Hooked up to machines
I was so pissed
I realized I'd failed
Friends and family surrounded me
They all looked so concerned
All I could think about
Is where were they before
When I needed them to show how much they cared
The answer was no where near me
I spent a week with a sitter on that floor
They no longer trusted me to be alone
I slowly recovered
I was asked why so many times
I lost count
But how could I even begin to explain
That I'd lost my will to go on
I was then moved to the behavioral health unit
I went to meeting after meeting
I had people attempting to fix me
When all I wanted was to be left alone
Eventually I left that awful place
And I haven't looked back
Ironically their cure for me was pills
But thankfully I'm no longer on medication
I want to do this on my own because I know I'm strong
It's been almost two years now
I'm glad I lived in so many ways
I have so much to live for
And so much to look forward to
I got the date 2-05-11 tattooed
Under the word believe on my wrist
Because no matter what happens in life
You have to believe everything
Will work out in the end
I lost sight of that that day
Now I'll never be able to forget
Some choices can be deadly
And sometimes there's never
A chance to go back
Some choices are permanent
And can never be changed
I'm so lucky that I got a second chance at life
