Our Song

I will play the song you sang for
me while we entwined our souls
underneath the maple trees.

^ I love this. It's really sweet and vivid, the image of a maple tree is probably one of my favorites.

I too think this has a lot of potential, or could be turned into a couple different poems. I don't know what your plan is for it, but I like the longing vibe that a few of the stanzas give off.

Oooooh, this was goooood!

"I will play the song you sang for
me while we entwined our souls
underneath the maple trees."

This stanza literally defines 'soul mate'. I like this. It shows that the speaker didn't just love this person, or have a physical relationship with them, it was a union of the souls, and it felt indestructible and unbreakable.

Im going to be honest, I would like to see what you could do with it in stanzas i think it has potential. Although in my taste coulod you add some details. Throughout though i get the feel of the emotions. And who doesnt like to dwell in the memories of the good times. I did like this its truely great.

Awh this is sooo sweet i wouldn't find any errors even if i tried really hard! the poem flows so beautifully and the story it tells is something that i have seen over and over but this time it's really different!

I find myself laughing, yet no one
has told a joke. My cup is not half
full nor is it half empty, there's no
place in between but our song will
continue to live through me.
^ this stanza is actually my favorite for it tells us what is in your heart but also that there is always the memories that keep us going even though at times it's hard so we joke around without really anyone telling a joke 5/5 my dear!

Queen Ash

Wow this has an amazing free flow and is very romantic