A Little Dash of Trepidation

I need to ask him for something - but that means I have to go to him.
Face to face, eye-to-eye, word-to-word, and thought-to-thought.
No.
I can't.
There must be another way.
There has to be another way to avoid those judging eyes.

I know there's someone behind them.
I can't stand the way they glace from left to right; from right to left; from left to right; up and down; down and up; left and down; up and right -
He's going to be too close.
I'll suffocate. My hands will lose control. I'll start picking at everything that isn't there. I'll tense up. I'll stop breathing.
Words
Words
Words
Judgments
Opinions
Hate
I will suffocate.

I have to find someone for me. I can't have this - not again.

19/03/14
Caroline Schmiermann