Comments : Trains and Nostalgia

  • 8 years ago

    by Saerelune

    Moving to another country does this to us, eh. I can relate, but you worded it so beautifully. I haven't written for so long again either. I wear lipstick and paint my nail red to look vintage but truth is I'm a child that lost her poet. Damn this inspires me. Thank you for writing and having a voice.

  • 8 years ago

    by Chelsey

    Omg this is crazy.

    That opening stanza is exactly where I am at write now. How do you pen that feelings so well if you feel you've lost your poet? Wow. Go lay down somewhere because that is far from the truth.

    Yaki I can't imagine what its like moving countries, I'm trying to move states soon and I'm like ughhh this is gonna be the craziest thing I've ever done. But its long over due and theres so much more out there.

    The best we can do is make the best of everything. Don't let a day go by where this dream is wasted and you spend it high trying to numb the transition. Not saying this pill you mentioned is a narcotic, if it is, message me so we can talk about this lol

    I think you are beautiful for embarking what you've always dreamed of, and keep on keepin on babe because life is too short to waste and regret opportunities. Even if we make bad choices in the midst of opportunities, we have to bounce back.

    I have noooooo idea what compelled me to try and encourage you but there you go. lol xoxox

  • 8 years ago

    by JaneDoeWrites

    This is an amazing poem, one that I feel a lot can relate to. "So everyday, I become less poet and more woman." This is a fantastic line... and when I wade through the way my inspiration ebbs, I feel the same. Note though, in the last stanza you wrote "men" but I think you meant "man". Fantastic write, I will be adding this to my favorites!

  • 8 years ago

    by Ben Pickard

    "He is white with age but I swear I can't even tell which one of us has been on earth longer."
    May I just say, this last line is a stroke of brilliance. A deserved win; well done.
    Ben

  • 8 years ago

    by Sunshine

    This is one of those so-called powerful poems. This is just heart touching. I personally relate to every word. It feels as though the writer, "Yakari" built a character in this poem that lives in every single poet and writer.

    Your opening stanza is to moving, how you reflected your fight in keeping the poet in you.

    A very lyrical piece. The closing stanza is so sad, and so rich with honesty and rawness.

    Well done..

  • 8 years ago

    by Milly Hayward

    I loved the image of shrinking like a mushroom in a pan and sitting next to a man white with age and not being able to tell who had been on the earth longer.

  • 8 years ago

    by Em

    I like how you compared yourself to a mushroom because you feel you as a poetess is shrinking. Your description is beautiful and heartfelt. Well done

  • 7 years ago

    by Kips2.0

    Wow! Bloody good! You're such a deep-thinking writer! Wish I could do this well.