A gas tank running on fumes
My brother of so many years
Yet just shy of blood on my right
Driving from who knows where to
Her doorstep
I could not believe my eyes
And the things and places my eyes saw
I was a man on top of the world
But such was not as it seemed
The arguments crippled the air around my lungs
The long nights left to my own thoughts
How destructive they became
My only relief was lapping waves of sea
Until that shattering text
Whilst by the sea I could not breathe
Yet I remained on the shore
"She cheated"
Oh how psychotic things became
A brilliant mind diluted by acidic poison
No one ever said miracles were painless
The months past on
My brothers grew and so did I
I still remember that night
When it all started with her
Sitting around surrounded with the brothers I loved
More than my own blood
That message that started a dream
And the hills we had to face just to even begin
Seeing into each others eyes
The cheating ex trying to ruin it all
Subterfuge mixed with my own trust issues
The poison stirring in the back of my mind from the start
Yet she persisted
Oh and the things and places my eyes saw
I was a man on top of the world
Spending nights around a fire listening to the white caps and the radio
And the quiet evenings laying on the couch watching the tube
But that brilliant mind slowly felt the poison take hold again
The arguments arose
The distance grew
And before I knew it we were hundreds of miles apart
In mind and body
And how long that poison remained its acidity burning
Through mind and veins and heart
No one ever said miracles were painless
And yet
Walking through those halls
A passing glance, a fleeting smile
Fifteen seconds of courage and a cup of coffee
A convoluted past, both mine and hers
A ball, a dance, and car ride conversations
My face still hurting for the laughing and joy
And still, with time to tell,
Has my mind found its antidote
I can only hope, as I wait patiently
But hopefully the poison does not take first
No one ever said miracles were painless
But damnit my mind is growing weary of this poison
I can solve equations in a matter of seconds
I can lead others into any situation
Pressure is a mere motivator
I have suffered incomprehensible pain
And have risen stronger from each struggle that ensued
And yet this acidic poison dilutes my thoughts
Ruins my train of thought
And drains my brain of everything but shadows and misguiding thoughts
I am tired of the pain that courses through my capillaries
No one ever said miracles were painless
But let that miracle be my antidote
