Paper ring (Shakespearean sonnet)

by Mr. Darcy   Jan 5, 2017


If love upon a ball of twine flew high,

A big balloon of red for all to see;

It would not be enough, I'll tell you why:

: : A greying cloud may mask my love for thee?

If love was breath; the sweet song of a bird,

A melody just dancing like a wisp,

It too might quake, allow me to answer:

: : It's tune may shy from Vultures in the mist?

To share my love with you forever more,

I shall release the words my heart doth sing;

In ink and verse my river flows so pure,

Indelible - for you this paper ring.

: : To show my lasting love for you this day,
: :
: : A sonnet sings my song for you always.

© 2017 - Mr. Darcy

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  • 7 years ago

    by Ben Pickard

    Michael,

    Not sure how I must this but it is a simply stunning little sonnet and the couplet is marvellous, sprinkled with some mesmerising alliteration.

    Well done indeed on this,

    Ben

  • 7 years ago

    by Brenda

    Michael, such a sweet love sonnet. I love all your sweet descriptives, it just adds that whimsy to this. Well done-

    • 7 years ago

      by Mr. Darcy

      Thank you ladies. I've worked hard on this one to get where it is now. I guess like love we get out what we put in.

      Thanks again.

  • 7 years ago

    by Golden AnGel Rhapsodist

    Hi sir ,

    you never failed to empress me with yar cute layout. ...Very artistic. ..

    To share my love with you forever more,

    I shall release the words my heart doth sing;
    ^^^
    ---How sweet Mr. Darcy. ..I can feel how you love this person

    In ink and verse my river flows so pure

    Indelible - for you this paper ring.
    ^^
    nice choice of words from you w/c I adore ..I like the imaginary. ..actually these line are so powerful. ..thought t'was the end

    ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

    To show my lasting love for you this day,

    A sonnet sings my song for you always.

    ^^^
    then followed by these another powerful lines. ...
    Love is so powerful it can make the little thing to see, to hear and to sing. ... isn't it amazing?

    Well done
    a standing ovation for this.

    Gel

  • 7 years ago

    by Kasie

    Beautiful, yet again. I don't know how you do it, but you do it well.

    • 7 years ago

      by Mr. Darcy

      Thank you, Kasie. There are times when they come easier than others. It really is about hearing the beat. Tell me, when you read them to you hear the beat?

  • 7 years ago

    by Em

    Michael, another wonderful sonnet and it's nice that other people are trying these too and I look forward to being able to mastering these someday especially with help from the sonnet master classes :) I do like how you space these out, I'm not sure if it's your intention or not but it lets me digest what has been said fully.

    1/ I love this opening it's pretty sweet because (I feel) you're saying I could send out a message in a hit air balloon or take you for a hot air balloon ride (don't ask why I though this though I feel it's romantic) but would there be any point because the clouds would mask your true intentions thud ending in tears so to speak.

    2/ Again, you could get birds to hug your love songs but vultures would take them away.. I feel this has a deeper meaning though and the vultures' could be those jealous people intent on ruining things though probably wrong.

    3/ This is so sweet because you will write your love for this person with blood, sweat and tears gone into them and they will be indelible - hard to remove or not easy to forget because they are such pure words with a lot of meaning behind them.

    Couplet/ A lovely ending that your love will always shine through in writing, maybe you're not good with words like me so writing helps too I'm not sure.

    Gets a 10 from Em :)

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