He resurrected a part of my soul that I thought was dead and gone. He broke the writers block that silenced and tormented my creative mind and passionate soul for many years. He forced me to see my own dark side that was desperately fighting to come out and meet daylight. He helped me overcome lifelong insecurities by confrontation and acknowledgement instead of burying them and acting as if they never existed, because they did exist. He taught me how to live with the demons that once gnawed at my soul and made my very existence an impossible one. He also made me feel terrible by opening my eyes to the truth–especially my own shameful truths. I saw myself in such a light that I could finally accept the mistakes I once refused to own–a necessary step forward in healing. It wasn’t until then that I was able to see myself as being worthy of forgiveness or peace–in fact, I owed it to myself to continue living. He looked out for my best interests no matter how controlling it may have seemed at times. He knew what I didn’t need to do and he knew who I didn’t need in my life. I came to know that I did indeed need the Devil in my life and he did in fact need me. Out of all the seemingly small obstacles and defective parts of myself that I learned to overcome and embrace, I take the most comfort and pride in knowing that I taught him a thing or two in our short time together. Deep in my heart, I believe this to be true::What other selfless and unconditional act could better fit the description of how he has treated me, if not love? I feel that this is in it’s own little way…the deal I made with the Devil. Even if I never see him again, I owe him nothing–though, I will always remember him.
