Saved from fear

by Nicholas W Jones   Jun 2, 2019

I can't remember the reason. I can't remember the season in which our love ended.
I can't confide in God the name of her with such beauty in whom I loved.
I can no longer feel stains from tears long gone.
There's no longer that empty, feeling felt after each I love. I can't remember when my heart started to beat again. I can't remember the moment we said Goodbye.

But I can remember the time I felt safe enough to say hello. I can remember our first date 02/18/19, I can remember it all. As my heart beats and that feeling that this could be it. And then I remembered you.
For some reason, your face came to the forefront of my mind fear gripped me taken hold of me moment after moment choking me as I scream soundlessly

Then a warmth of a hand in mine, holding tightly refusing to let go. Then I hear new words crashing though, the darkness fight to get near to me.
Beating down my fears, crushing my anxiety those words I can finally remember. Words only my heart could hear. She spoke them but only I could hear "I love you, I've waited for you to see, I wanted you to hear it in my voice I understand your fear but im not her let her Go "

The words reached me and I heard the word rush from my mouth "Goodbye LYJ, the memory of you has held me long enough "

As I open my eyes I see her and tell her I've been afraid to love again but if you have this battered man, broken by love over and over again then I have to tell you I can't say I Love You, because I've forgot the feel those words once held but if you teach me to love again I will.


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