A Price To Pay

Awareness of daylight
Unspoken words ashore
Drowned in empty darkness
The numbness hits my core

Withdrawn from my inner self
Unconnected to speak
The hollow echos follow
My head feels weak

Curse by my demon
A moment or mistake
Cut into pieces
A single pain I would take

Haunted in my dreams
Sweating to the sheet
Caught up in this circle
My heart feels the repeat

A worthless soul
A useless body
A screwed up mind
A painful hobby

Do you believe in crosses
Do you see it as a sign
Carved into my thigh
I won in a straight line

It takes moments to realise
That silver wrench understands
It closes in tightly
And doesn’t let go of my hands

The battle keeps arising
But I’m unconscious in my head
The weight is anchored tightly
My inner fight is dead

I hear the echos of nothingness
The memories staggered straight
Movement in the sunset
Forgiveness is too late

To feel enough to be honoured
To feel enough & to not hide
To be cared for correctly
To be loved from the outside

The cost of innocence
Was a price to far to pay
They didn’t care when they did it
And I’m here paying the price today.