My Way to SLowly Die

Push it in deeper,
Watch it break the skin,
Tormented soul and unfree heart
Beats silently caged within.
Friends say that I'm crazy,
And they wish I would stop
Tried a million times to cover it,
But it's something they won't drop.
Emotion sickness feeds on my brain,
And makes its way to my heart.
Then silently snaps my chord to the ground,
Allowing the insanity to start.
The pain overwhelms my body,
Tears all bolt out quick.
Thoughts of suicide race my mind,
And obsession grows on thick.
I lock myself inside my room,
And allow myself to cry.
The tears drowning my aren't enough,
Too slow for me to die.
The disgust of pity grows
As I set the rest of my sanity aside.
And dart through my tattered world,
In hopes to find a knife.
Sitting in silence for a moment,
Wondering where to cut first,
Figuring how much I'll need to bleed for them more,
To prove my unworthy-worth.
Once Again I push this razor,
or knife or whatever it is I found,
Once the rush of tranquil satisfaction's gone,
I throw myself to the ground
I hurt for all I've lost.
And every pain I've gained.
I cut myself to feel alive,
I cut because I'm ashamed.
I injure and starve the body I hate,
Because I wish it wasn't mine.
I attempt to suppress the person inside,
It's my way to slowly die.