A fake life

A smile upon my lips
A lie, fake…
Always happy, joking around
Hiding the hurt…
Laughter ringing from my mouth
Dead and unreal…
Surrounded by friends, in a crowd
Yet always feel alone…
Feeling so very cheerful 24/7
Covering the sadness…
Mucking around, having heaps of fun
In truth, depressed…

What people don’t see,
Is what I have hidden, my whole life
The pain, the loneliness, the unwanted feeling
I’m talked about behind my back, I’m put down
So called friends, stabbing me in the back
But I try to hold my head high
Try to prove, they don’t get to my
But, I’m just lying to myself
Cos, when I get home
I lock my door, and grab a knife
I try to slice away the pain
I just want to die
But just as I think my wish has true
Someone always mangers to find me
But not this time
This time I will slip
Slip into the black void of death
And there I will finally
Be able to sleep in peace
Never to return
So this is my farewell
For it’s my time to escape
To leave this hell
So goodbye to my crap life
Its over, it’s gone, with one hack of my knife.