Help

Every night in my room
I would lock myself and hide
Turn the music up really loud
So they would not hear the screams of mine.

So mum and dad would not get scared
That I was doing something wrong
So they would not know
That no longer am I strong

For I do not want them to see
All the pain their daughter goes through
I do not want them to see
And no longer be proud of me

I sit there with the light right down low
As I start to cut
My heart begins to slow

I can see the blood rushing
Right from my very vein
But I do not take any notice
That im in so much pain

I do this every night and I always will
Until the day that knife
Gets dug in nice and deep
So forever I will sleep.

I feel life has left my behind
I feel its not going to stop
So the only way to get through it
Is to fall down and drop.

I know you may not see God,
When you’re sitting from a far
All the pain I go through
Or you would of tried to maybe stop it
Make the pain go away even just a little bit.

So next time when you hear a cry
Know its me who wants to die
So God listen ever so carefully
To what I have to say
Or one fatal day a mistake
May be made.

By Amanda McMeekin