The Hurt

Death was the word I considered most
I wanted to do it, I came so close
Everything was wrong, nothing was right
I could not stand to be here another night.

All of my feelings had been tattered
A healthy heart was now so shattered
I did not know why, I did not know how
but my life was going to end, and it had to be now.

First there was him, who tore me apart
He cut my soul, and sliced my heart
He should've just murdered me on day one
Then my life could've been done.

But he waited so long, a year & a half
He made sure it would hurt, to be disattached
Saying goodbye with no feelings of regret
Could he not see the pain I felt yet?
Then there was her, my very best friend
She was suppose to be here, to help my heart mend.
I could not get through this all on my own
I thought that was something I had shown.

But she too, left me alone to hide
I had no one to wipe my tears when I cried
No one was here to help me out
Death was the word which my heart would shout.

I tried to do it, I had to leave
I couldn't stand with no one next to me.
But since everything goes wrong, nothing goes right,
I could not take away my own life.

I failed to stop this heart from beating
I couldn't even stop my very own breathing.
Death seemed like it wasn't possible for me
Why couldn't God just let me free?

Loved ones were hurt, but not so bad
No one really cared, that made me mad
Life is pointless in my eyes
I'm sick & tired of holding in my cries.

People say they know just how I feel
But they don't, unless they've been through this deal.
I've acted like I'm good and everything is alright
but day after day it seems harder to fight.

If I could take back anything in this life
It would be to never have taken out that knife
I would've said it's over a long time ago,
Now maybe I wouldn't have these scars to show.

** Please rate or comment on this! I know it's really long but I would really appreciate it. **