My Memories

I sit here in this room.
Remembering just me and you.
I wanted to tell you,
But I couldn't find the words,
To say, “ I love you”.

We had so many good times,
So many memories.
I think of you,
And can hardly see.
I try to hold them back,
These tears in my eye,
But it’s no use.

I fall to the ground,
And start to pray,
That I won’t have to wait,
To long to see you again.

For once god answers,
But it’s no good.
He tells me to wait,
And stay on this earth.

I ball up my fists,
And start to cry.
God asks me why,
I can’t answer,
He decides I’m too shy.

I get up,
And wave goodbye.
Silly god,
He thought I was waving to him.

Little did he suspect,
Of the plan I had inside,
To end my pain.

I ran up the steps,
Two at a time,
I reached under my bed,
And found what I was seeking.

I see my knife,
So shiny and bright.
I close my eyes,
And start to cut.

I see the blood,
Stream down my wrist,
As it slips off my skin,
Onto the cold floor.

I’m down on my knees,
To weak to stand.
The world begins to spin,
I wondering when it will end.

I made a mistake;
I said it out loud.
I forgot god was watching,
From his cloud.

He spots me,
And starts to yell,
I cut him off,
Before he said a word.

I took my knife,
And said goodbye.
I turn around,
And end it all.

My last thoughts
Are of you.
The last thing I see,
Is your face.
And the last thing I murmured,
Is “ I love you”