I Have To Erase Myself

A bleak darkness
Has enveloped me
A fog so thick and black
I can not see

Death seems so safe
The forever sleep
So maybe I will let this blade
Cut in far too deep

I don’t know how
To ever forget
All I have is pain
Shame and regret

I wish I could move on
But I don’t deserve to smile
Every time I try and connect to others
They seem to run a mile

And this desperate agony
Seems to bring despair
That leeches onto my mind
I know I have no chance of life out there

Things have drifted too far
Nothing matters any more
I surrender, Misery you have me
Heart and soul, I slam the door

I talk and talk, secrets spill out
But now I see the mistake
The more I talk
The more I break

This is it now
One final fall
I despair that I never
Really gave my all

But I know I am just a speck
In a massive work of art
The muck up that must be erased

You can not save me,
I have already fallen apart.

© Copyright Sharon Ardern 2004