Regretting Death

No one knows how it feels
To be dying inside.
Pretending nothings wrong
When there’s so much your trying to hide.

I’m crying inside
While there’s a smile on my face.
I’m surrounded by those who love me
But I’m still wishing to get out of this place.

I walk around for hours
Not knowing what to do.
Wishing, hoping
That my life could be through.

When I look in the mirror
I hate what I see
My own worst enemy
Staring back at me.

I spend days in agony
Not even knowing why.
I’d be fine one moment.
Then suddenly break down and cry.

I don’t want people to comfort me,
I just want to be alone.
I don’t need anyone’s pity,
I want to be unknown.

I have yet no reasons
For my own distress
It's just the pain of life
That makes me lack happiness

“Just jump” I tell myself
“It’s a beautiful day to die”
I look down from the bridge.
Damn, it seems so high.

No, not this way,
It’ll make too much of a scene.
Sometimes I think
Life is just a dream.

A nightmare in fact
That you can’t wake up from.
Thinking when will I wake up.
When will it all be done?

I held the bottle in my hands
Too scared to look away.
That’s it I had enough
Today is my day.

Pop 2, swallowed four
I feel my eyes get weak.
Popped six, then two more.
I could barley even speak.

I could feel the pain already.
Damn these things work fast.
I sat down in agony
How long with this torment last?

I saw my reflection in the mirror
What a disgusting face.
I cried a million tears
Of pain and disgrace.

How could I be so foolish?
I'm not ready to go yet;
But it's too late to turn back
This is my last regret

I see the light and hear familiar voices
I guess it’s all too late.
I feel hands tugging at me.
I open my eyes and…….I’m awake.