The Midnight Roses

I walk along outside as the sun shines bleakly from above
I walk the lonely path that has been worn down by my feet many times before
I look to my right to my left, there is no nature out to play
No wind to toss my blond hair and twirl it around its wispy fingers
no rabbits wiggling their tiny pink noses, smelling out the danger
I bend down to pick the black roses along the side of the path
As I pick them, one by one, from the ground, they scream in pain
As I pull their damp stems from the cracked ground
Little ants run over my fingers, the little black antennas waving in the breeze
I giggle and brush them away
I take my bouquet of darkness and pain and bring them back to my sanctuary
Where I set them in a glass vase carved from my hopes and dreams
They wilt instantly, the black petals detaching from the flower and floating down
They spin and turn on their way
When they hit the ground they turn into dust, a small black mysterious heap
The leaves turn brown and curl, then they too fall
I watch it happen and I cry crystal tears
This happened every time I tried
I don’t know why I was sad it died when what I really wanted was for it to go away
It was confusing and my head whirled
I wanted to see it go
Blow
Go away
I was alone when what I really wanted was for him to be with me
But he couldn't and I accepted, I’ve learned
That no one wants me
No one loves me
So I just have to live with it and try to love myself
And try to love those midnight roses
Because, they weren’going away anytime soon
I wipe my face, where the tears had run down in rows
Making my face glow in the sliver of a moon that had just appeared
And the stars that twinkle outside of my mind
I put one foot in front of the other and I run outside
I never want to stop running
Because maybe if I run so far, I can run away from myself
And away from my problems
And I can forget about you and forget about me
And I can move on and those midnight roses will drip off their black coverings
white can be seen underneath, the innocent can be seen
but for now those roses are still dark and they laugh at me
they mock at me willing me to shed blood
so that they can be happy and content
my running continues and I pass my memories that I cannot lose
cannot forget for I never lose grasp, the midnight roses…