Behind the window

Watching myself on a cinema screen
My life played in front of me like a movie
Seeing myself from a far away place
I am not enjoying watching me

The cinema shows my raw emotions
Mixed up feelings flood my brain
These people hold my full devotion
Experience agonising pain

Watching life behind a window
Watch myself unravelling
Unimaginable tension
To myself I’m grovelling

As I watch my every move
This movie of my life
Problem upon problem falls
Causing me this strife

Bouts of depression pull me in
Bouts of furious anger
Sliding further and further away
I can cope no longer

Darkened clouds of lightening
Surround me where I walk
Like a storm following me
Venom my way to talk

Bitter feelings cloud my thoughts
Changing what I’m thinking
Shadowing me wherever I go
Into my madness I’m sinking

Maniacal giggles escape my mouth
As my insane mind plots against this world
For the hurt that it has caused me
Slivers of hate in my mind unfurl

Standing behind the blackened screen
Watching myself into madness descend
Trying hard to make myself stop
There is no-one upon whom I can depend