The Search

Once I stumbled
And couldn't get back up.

My world crumbled
And wouldn't fix itself.

I watched myself fall
Unable to catch me.

Convinced I'd lost it all
I let life drown and disappear.

I pretended that I was gone
I refused to breathe anymore.

I couldn't take what was wrong
I wanted to end my life.

It felt like I was stood
Waiting for something magical.

The drugs and drink did no good
Just made me delusional.

I was searching for
Something, I didn't know what.

Tired, I couldn't break down the door
So I lay down outside the world.

I took a blade to my wrist one night
I laid back and let myself fade.

It wasn't wrong and it wasn't right
I was just too confused to think.

They saved my life, and I’m still here
Writing about God everyday.

I'm still confused, but now something’s clear:
I was looking for God, and I think I've found Him now.

© Copyright Sharon Ardern 2005