Lost and Broken

When I look at myself I see a mistake;
Looking back at me with empty eyes.
I see all I'm not and all I'll never be;
The truth somewhere in my hearts lies.

"I looked at her picture of when she was younger;
And I was overcome with grief of what she's become."
These words soaking in, ripping me apart;
It still hurts, even if my heart feels numb.

Trying to fix the loose ends;
But they fray again.
Trying to mend all thats broken;
But the pain will remain.

"Why talk to her, she's worthless,"
More and more I am starting to think its true.
All the time spent trying to change;
Thrown away because it means nothing to you.

Every word spoken thrown away in disregard;
Every hug leaving a sick feeling inside of me.
Because I know how you really feel;
I see past the lies you want me to believe.

Still you have me walking a maze of emotional pain;
And I cannot find its ending.
Wondering through its halls;
But I cannot see the paths I'm treading.