I feel

I'm on the floor
trying to open a new door
i look around
but its only me on the ground
i feel the pain
the overwhelming shame
i sit contemplating suicide
wishing to push the thought aside
i hold my blade
watching my dreams fade
i feel it break my skin
i feel it cut deep within
i sit wondering if it will ever end
wondering if my heart will mend
i feel my body giving in
to my sin
i feel my tears
giving in to my fears
i feel my body letting go