My feelings

I'm trying to find a happy face-
but there is absolutely no one in this place-
It seems like my days are getting longer-
And I'm not getting any stronger-
My feet are begging to drag-
As I'm caring my black bag-
I'm in great emotional pain-
I just wish they would go down the drain-
from the black bag, I pull out a blade-
-Hoping that my memories will soon fade-
The feelings tell me that I should soon die-
and please OH please don't ask why-
If I'm not OK between my chest-
Then please put me down to rest-