My last goodbye

Goodbye I've said it so many times before
each and every time, praying I'll say it no more
and as the sun sets
and the moon raises high into the sky
i realize that finally this will be my last goodbye
and as a passionate artist i paint the words upon my arm, making each and every line count yet knowing they wont deep down.
although the effect i wish them to give will only last a while, until that time is up my soul will be on trial
and if to me heavens gates are once again denied
at least in my own mind i will know i tried
and as my tired and tatted soul is sent back to hell, the fires wont overwhelm me as i know this pain all to well
so as i am served my sentence i will spend out my time,
even though angelic wings i know i could not find
to me it does not matter, for i always knew they were at stake
i will just be so ever grateful if it were to be my last heartbreak
so now i guess that heaven will be the final lie I'm told
and with this silver brush
i will whisper my last goodbyes
as now there is no one left to hold
and nothing left to hide