Wish You Saw

by Staind Soul   Sep 12, 2005


Wish you saw the real me,
The prisoner that's never free,
A broken man with trembling flaws,
Everyday ripped apart by society's feeble claws,

Wish you saw the real me,
This transient flesh he cannot flee,
He shakes and waits for something better,
False hopes introduced to the Shredder,

Wish you saw the real me,
A sight no one should see,
Distorted film which his life's projected
Spit upon as one of life's rejected,

Now you see the real me,
The one who just could not be,
He will always be covered in stains of time,
half dead in his mind he continues to wait for lifes final chime

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Latest Comments

  • 18 years ago

    by Not Bulletproof

    Correction: and I don't ever want you to be sad, or to hide from me.***

    Sorry. :-).

  • 18 years ago

    by Not Bulletproof

    Wow. Deep write, m'love. I do hope it's not true, though. I love you so, so, so, so, so much, and I don't ever want you to be sad, or to hide from you. You're too amazing. E> I love you.

    About the poem again, though. I love your descriptions, especially in the first stanza. "A broken man with trembling flaws". E> Amazing. Pure genius. The second stanza is awesome too. I'm sure a lot of people can relate to this...and I also liked how you brought up the shaking again. Okay, the third stanza, definitely my favorite. "Distorted film which his life's projected, Spit upon as one of life's rejected" E> My FAVORITE part. Absolutely outstanding. So creative. :-). Annnddd of course your ending, it's marveelouuss. Only took three tries! :-). I love it.E> You're such a fabulous writer, my prince. I hope you never stop. *Hugs tightly* Smile for me baby, I'm here for you if you ever need to talk....I love you, so much. Take care, please. xoxoxox

    Love you always,
    .xxx.Mortie.xxx.

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