It's Over

I sit in my room and wonder
Why am I not good enough?
I don’t do anything right
I can’t do anything right

Thoughts fill my mind
Tears fill my eyes
And run down my face
The warm drop runs down my face
And in some sense feels good

My mind is flooded with problems
Some mine, and some of others
Fights, drama, and relationships
When and is it ever going to end?

Questions come to mind too
Is anything I do good enough?
Am I really cared about?
Would I be happier if I just ended it?
Would others be too?

The more I think…
The more I feel the warm water
Running down the sides of my face
With sadness, grief, and anger

Will someone please just understand?
I cant do it all…
I try yet what I can do isn’t
appreciated what so ever

The tears start to fade
They turn into screaming
Pounding headache and knots
In my stomach and throat

It turns into too much
I go grab something and grasp it in my hand
The cold smooth metal feels good
It feels like a taste of relief

I look at my arms and wrists
This could all just end here and now
Is it worth it?
Is it really worth it?

The metal feels good on my skin
I feel the sharp pain and then relief
The red liquid seeps out and runs
On to my arm and then the floor

I lay there and think
Its finally gonna be over…!
I then start to feel more pain
I think about the blood

I start to feel sick
And then the relief is back
My eyes close
And it’s finally all over