Never Far

My friends ask me if i enjoy wearing long sleeved shirts
They ask me if i feel pain, i tell them that it never hurts

It really hit me the other day
I was at practice and i didn't know what to say

Someone brought up how i burnt my arm
Then she wanted to know why i put myself in so much harm

Words turned into a tear
I didn't want to listen but it's something I had to hear

They told me I'm not stupid or screwed up in the head
I just need to learn how to talk, they don't want me to end up dead

The look on my friend's faces really hit me though
I told them i stopped, they didn't know

And honest to God i do try to stop it
I ain't doing this because of the people i hang out with

I get so pissed off so i take it out on me
I freak out, i guess you can say mentally

I take anything sharp, anything that i can find
I cut myself trying to ask God to forgive my mind

I remember when my friends and i would be out drinking
I'd break a bottle without even thinking

I'd get a piece of glass and just use it
I'd use plastic too, i didn't give a shit

I would keep lighters lit then burn my skin
I'd start to feel better within

I take whatever I want and do things that i want to do
It doesn't hit me until it's too late too

But i wish that i didn't do this no more
My friends are the ones hurt, the ones i live for

If i could take this away i absolutely would
My scars hurt way more than they should

Dear God, I need your strength to carry on
I want more time, i don't want to be gone

And if something should happen and i leave at the wrong time
I don't want my friends to hurt, none of them should be crying

I want them to make something out of themselves
And put all of our memories on their top shelves

And as i fade to whatever way i go
If my friends get asked to do this stuff, i want them to say no

And let them live in piece, they worked hard for where they are
And I want them to know I'm always close, never far