Mixed up

Inside I feel mixed up.

Very lost, and very still.

I feel like somethingâ??s missing.

I wish the space would fill.

How could he love another girl?

How could he be so cruel?

How could he not still love me?

I wonder, am I just a fool?

Our relationship is so unstable.

Two people once single, happy free

Once joined together and found,

That without this person in their life,

They could barely breath.

Weâ??re on and off and on again.

A roller coaster of feelings.

At times so sweet and happy,

Yet at others so cold and unfeeling.

The things weâ??ve said and done to each other

Have been so mean and wrong.

I wonder if we should just call it quits,

Yet through everything we have also been so strong.

Through hell Iâ??ve made us journey.

Through sadness, betrayal tears and fights.

Through nights when out hearts both hurt,

Thinking there was no light.

And yet we still came back together,

Time and time again.

Have I grown too dependent? Would it best for it to end?

Or have I simply fallen in love? Is what we have worth trying to mend?

We will have to break up soon,

For a long time if not forever.

Should we just use this as an opportunity to break up?

Forever and forever?

Only one thing is for certain.

I am sure of just one thing.

That I loved you and you loved me.

And that what we had was magic.

That you were my first true love,

And although this tale is tragic,

I will never forget you or the time we shared.

I will always remember your beautiful green eyes,

And that long, long shaggy hair.

I wonâ??t soon forget your touch, your laugh, your love.

And same with those cute boxers Iâ??d always see you wear.

Inside I feel mixed up.

Very lost, and very still.

I only know that I love you.

I probably always will.