Hold On

Aw hun, this is great, very well written & a strong message inside, lovely work, I think you have a great future ahead of you in poetry, take care, xxoo

Good work on the poem it has a good meaning. It sounds like you're trying to reach out to the person and tell them that they will miss a lot if they kill themself.

What an encouraging and persuading poem. The repeating of "hold on" worked well because it got the message loud and clear into the readers head. It read as sort of a desperate plea from one person to another, begging them to think before they jump so to speak. I liked the last line too, a strong ending. Only suggestion is to think about different words to describe things, it's just I feel in places you have repeated yourself where it isn't necessary and maybe a more creative word could be put in it's place.
Anyway good job, keep it up.

That is very inspirational. You should post it on the discussion boards. Maybe it will make some peoples days brighter. Just a thought but a very great poem.

Great message in this one and nice flow...i think more people need to think along these lines. great job 5/5

Sara