XxIn the middlexX

I can hear every beat within my heart
I can feel the blood racing threw my body
Not wanting to thinking
Not wanting to sleep

Cause thinking only brings back the memories
Sleeping only brings the night mares alive
And reality I'm not ready to face
I can't look back
I'm to scared to look forward

So I'm left here, in the middle
Not knowing who i am
Not knowing what i want or where I'm going
I know nothing but this pain and the fear i live with everyday

Is this really me? Is this really how i need to be
Looking in the mirror i see a girl
and thats not me not who i want to be
I look around and i see i never wanted to be this
Never wanted this life for me

So where do i go when theres no one
No one who understands
No one that can hold me tight
and say it will be all right..where do i go now?