All lies

I couldn't ignore the pain any longer
Life was just too much
I never saw my life in future times
Or happiness and love and such

Id been to the edge
with the intent to jump
And had become happy with thoughts of no pain
Feeling my uselessness as an inherited curse
I had nothing left to gain

The sun failed to shine
In my world overcast
Birds no longer sang
And the first had become the last

All things good and whole
Had turned and went their way
They were never to return to me
So I felt I should just go away

Consumption by hate, to save was too late
Where should I turn now?
Why do I get kicked when Im down?
When could I be happy? Or even better, how?

Fallen and fetal
I will return to the dirt
Bittersweet battle within
No longer would I hurt

Smiles soon faded
And hearts followed to break
As I cried out for help
I cried in heavens sake

Routinely I cried
For a hand to reach to me
I looked blankly at emptiness stare
And closed my eyes reluctantly

But I felt one more fight, a chance in me
To save myself from isolation
Piercing my lips were words of insignificance
And the end to my frustration

As time's hands moved on and on
Together, as one, we grew
Now solitary routine you seek
You seek you never knew

Tired of times we spend together
Tired of me you grow
Tired of being tired in time
No feelings will you show

But in time as your thoughts are even
Will I be thought of only as your pawn
And will you be happy or sad
When Im finally gone?