Ghost of you

I cannot move my hand to day.. its very hard to type
As last night i did it again... i wanted to end my life
Everyone's picture flashed in my mind
As i cut down with the blade for the very last time
Cutting is not new to me... but it was to someone else
I showed her my arm... my way of asking for help
But i didn't know her problems... so dark and heavily held
So she took that blade... and joined me in hell
Now... things went quiet for a while.. we lost our touch
But both of us kept cutting... even though the promise meant so much
We both like this cutting.. it relieves our pain
Even though we have tried to stop.. over and over.. again
The blade is like a ghost..
Silver with a dangerous glint at most
So now it is the morning after..and i can clearly see
That the silver ghost keeps haunting me
Will it ever arise
And relieve from something i dispize
But keeps me going day by day
So in many ways.. don't take it away
Without it i am weak.. like a rain drop in the grass
But how do i cope without the ghost.. its all that i ask
I don't want to have to cope this way.. live forever with the scars
But as i live my life right now.. i hope no one cares....

to be continued...

*plz rate and comment as it would mean a lot to me*