I never thought this would be me

I never thought this would be me
The one with the door locked
In her room with a blade in her hand
Seeing the blood appearing on her wrist
Wanting to stop but she can't
She still has that urge to keep going
To just go from one wrist to the other
She goes from her wrists to her leg
She went to from dangerous to deadly in a split second
She tries to be more careful on her leg
She dodoesnt?t want to dig too deep
The first cut begins to bleed
Starts to sting but she takes the pain
Starts with little cuts but ends up with big cuts
Praying she doesnt go down to far
She falling so far, she so lost
She wants to be found but no one is looking
People that know want to help but can't
She wont let them she wants to get up on her own
She wants to learn from her mistakes the hard way
She wont listen to anyone that has advice
She goes places with wristbands on
Hoping no one sees the cuts
Always wearing jeans until the cuts heal
Hoping that the blood doesnt bleed through her jeans
Taking painkillers to try and get the pain to go away
But it doesnt work, its too late now
Her legs and arms are still stinging
She starts regretting doing it all
But still keeps on going
Eventually shes gonna stop she says
I said that 4 months ago