A Fading Childhood

As I sit here my mind drifts back to those years
When sadness was all but a few quiet tears,
When an argument was fixed by a little finger shake
And all difficult decisions were not yours to make.

A time when everything was better than it seemed
When you laughed all day, and lived for your dreams,
Not a care in the world, or a reason to be scared
Before plunging into the real world, completely unprepared.

Hitting terror, anger, sadness, and pain,
Full of jealousy and longing to be a child again,
Watching them skipping with laughter and play
Whilst often you battle with living each day.

When a graze on the knee caused just so much grief,
Now you self inflict them to bring some relief,
Where giggles would escape in a violent attack
Now you take pills in an attempt to bring them back.

Alone in the real world, there is no return
Moving on is something I will just have to learn,
Childhood fantasies still echo in my head
As I begin the battle with my nightmares instead.