Only Pain Remains

Tears streaming down my face,
I feel I'm in a flood,
The constant aching in my heart,
I'm not sure i can carry on,

The pain never gets any easier,
I've been lied to for years,
My hearts been breaking since the day,
You left me on this earth,

I remember it so easily,
The day that you died,
I was awaken in the morning,
To say you had lost your life,

I was just a little,
A little girl of eight,
And yet that day i became a woman,
And heartache was my fate,

I had to be strong for my family,
I had to be string for myself,
I had to to everything i possibly could,
To make sure it was the perfect wake,

I remember looking around the church,
So many faces i had never seen,
And yet the pain in their eyes,
Was more than i could take,

I never cried in the church,
I held it all inside,
I wanted to express myself,
But on my own terms,

And yet i feel so guilty,
That i should have shed a tear,
To let my dad know what he really means,
He was my guardian angel on earth,

Its been ten years since that awful day,
And the pain still remains,
I know the heartache will never go,
But my love for him is the same,

I only hope he looks down on me,
And watches as i write,
I want to say i love him,
So I love him and goodbye.