The end of your torture

I'm not sure what it is
but my body's called you once again
old friend

it's been 76 days since I felt your touch
I think I'm about to break the streak
I simply need your touch
my whole body awaits your caress

I remember the sweet bliss you brought me

I was doing so good not need your comfort
but now it's finally clicked
I have always needed you

since I put you away
something has been missing
I have felt that empty, hollow feeling

but now that I hold you in my hand
about to take the plunge
I feel whole once again

so I have let you bless my skin again
and a new feeling has taken over

guilt, and shame

you made me break a promise
you hurt the ones I love
you took me away
and tore me up inside, and out

I will never be the same again

I now realize, what you really are
you're a monster,
you're my worst fears
in a nice little package

my fear of giving up,
of losing the ones I love,
of not being me

you me changed forever
beyond repair
and not for the better

I hate you
oh how I hate you

you'll never be part of my life again
I shall banish you from my mind, boy and soul
I will not allow you to cause me more pain

and I will banish you from others lives as well

the last chapter of your existence has been written
The End.