~*~ i know this is kinda long
but please read it i want to
know what you think... ~*~
i still have bruises, cuts,and
scratches... my hearts still
healing and I'm still losing
your so fricken stupid
i hate you so much!!!
if only people could know
of the past..
the neighbors they remember
the screams and crys..
the yelling and the hatred
in your voice.. the killing
look you had in your eyes.
the sound of me being thrown
around
i remember everything and it
hurts me every time..
to even think of you as a father
it just blows my mind..
i cant believe you even went
that far.. you didn't even care...
if it wasn't for billy i wouldn't
even be here..
i remember the words you
told me and i remember the hits
i took..
i use to think you were the best
and i loved you with all my heart..
then you got mad at me and and
i kinda started to laugh and
that was it you started to rip
me apart.
you pulled out my hair and
punched me in the face.
you threw me down the stairs and
and then screamed and spit in
my face
you told me that you hate me and
that i was stupid and a
mistake... you told me i was a
ugly.. he told me i fake. he told
me if it wasn't for my mom he
would take my life away.
and then you tried to kill me you
hit me in the head..
i fell to the ground and the
blood dripped off my face.
i know that you still hate me
but guess what i hate you too..
your such a crappy father i think
i disowned you.
i know this might sound crazy and
i know that your gonna hate it..
but theres still something inside
of me that just wants to hug you.
i don't know what it is and i don't
know why... but theres part of me
that just wants to cry.
i hate you for what you did to me
and yes i still do cry.. but i still
love you and I'm not gonna lie.
your still the man that completed
me and i have you in my blood..
and 7 years ago i never thought i
would.
i tried to forget you
i even tried to hide.. but then i
thought of you and i couldn't
deny...
you expected me to be so
perfect at the age of 7.. but what
would you do if i would of died and
went to heaven...?
would you of even cried.. would
of done a thing..
or would you of just stood there
laugh and then walk away..
i always think about that and i
want to know..
have you ever loved me and will
i ever know...?
~~~~~~~~~~*~*~~~~~~~~~~~~
please comment me i will
return the favor
thanks....
kayla
