Hurting me

Every thing must be a lie,
i can never see it.
i must be blinde,
i should have knowen every thing is a lie.

i never knew how much people care,
but i look twice they only care for u.
i feel like my heart is swollen by darkness,
as i cry for hours i never reast.

illness is finaly came for me,
i hope i die in that care.
no one will miss me there,
i feel like im not goint to heaven.

but i know hell is there,
demons and decaying bodys.
my body is cold now,
must be dieing slowly.

im turning in to ice,
y skin is falling.
my life is nothing,
nothing but snow in the darkness.

im sliping away slowly from ur arms,
to my death slowly i die.
hopeing never to reast in peace,
i hurt people around me.

i get them mad,
i absorbe their sadness.
trying to make every one happy,
i feel the pain taking me over.

as i lay there in the snow,
as i lay in there the frozen ice.
as i cry in side there,
wishing to die.

i can not die,
i can not bare.
i have to lison to all jealusy, hate and dispare,
i had a promiss.

i have 2 promissess,
that bowns me to this earth,
promiss of marrieg,
promiss to live.

i cant see y i should sufer,
i wanna take their sufering and hold it.
tell it is mine so they can live,
nothing on my mind but a blank road ahead.

i ask for every on for forgiveness,
as i have been bad.
being nice is not all easy,
its hard to be with the darkness and be good at the same time.

may be i should leave every one alone,
leting them sufer.
leting them go,
hopeing for no fallow.

O wow how do i go,
i wont to be in their lifes.
will they let me,
or will they kill me.

i hate every thing i do bad,
hopeing some one can help.
nothing i can do,
is nothing i can help.

\" is there an angel i know out there? can he save me from disspare? he did once but he left. am i not suposed to have no one? cuz the way i am?\"